Marshmallows
by Drifting Warrior
Summary: The mission to retreive Sasuke has failed. Neji returns, gravely injured, his future as a shinobi in danger. Tenten finally begins to wake up to reality, her feelings, and some unexpected, yet expected, changes. NejixTenten
1. Chapter 1

AN: The beginning is a bit boring, and the sentences seem simple, obvious and the thought flow fragments because this is told from Tenten's point of view, and she's undergoing shock right now. Make sense? I promise it'll get more interesting!

Marshmallows (1)

At the start of winter, when the nights grew longer, all my friends would come to my house for a sleepover. Longer nights mean more fun.

We'd build up the fire as soon as they arrived, starting with an impudent spark. Ino brings the games. Hinata brings the movies. Sakura brings the hot chocolate. And I provide the marshmallows. It was a well established routine.

But this year, no one came. This year, the apartment is empty. No one is home. Not even me.

I'm at the Konoha hospital right now. The boys are back. Choji, Naruto, Shikamaru, Kiba, Neji. Naruto, Kiba, Choji and Shikamaru have all been dispatched. But Neji's still here. At least that's what I hope. He'd better not have left.

The sign glows crimson and the doors are shut tight, as if they were holding their breaths, like the rest of us, opening only to let disgruntled medics to rush by. I counted; there are at least four medics in there right now. Four medics and Granny Tsunade.

Sakura and Ino left about an hour ago when their parents arrived to pick them up. Hinata's still here, but she's asleep on the couch that sits in the corner next to the chiming grandfather clock. One. Two. Three. Four. That's how old I was when I first met him.

His forehead had been unmarked then.

Funnily enough, that's all I can think about right now. His forehead had been bare and smooth. I think. Or maybe bandages had covered it. I can't remember.

I should've asked him. Now I may never be able to. I want to know. I must know. I need to know.

I've only remember seeing that emerald shackle twice. Once then. Once tonight.

I was only able to catch a glimpse as they rushed him past, the wheels clattering on the cold floor, their feet pounding insistently. His forehead was bare: no forehead protector that marked him as a Konoha shinobi, none of the usual bandages.

But I am a shinobi, trained to take in the minutest details at a glance, to pick out all possible flaws and imperfections. Against enemy shinobi, this was useful and wanted. I don't want it now. I could see all the little signs that screamed something was wrong. His face was more pallid than ever underneath the gashes and bruises; his fingernails were slowly fading from pink to white.

The marshmallows are still sitting on the kitchen counter, where I had left them. Had that been only yesterday? They shouldn't be sitting there right now. They shouldn't.


	2. Chapter 2

Husk (2)

It's been nearly six days since that night. Hinata called, saying that we're allowed to see him now. Finally.

The medics say that he's "fine". The more I hear it, the more "fine" sounds like "not dead". They don't know how long he's going to be in the hospital. They don't even know if he's going to be all messed up. They don't know anything.

I don't know anything.

When I went to visit him, I found Granny Tsunade standing outside his door. She looked at me funny, and then lifted an arm to block my way.

"You have to agree to some restrictions," she said tiredly.

"Fine," I snapped.

"Don't try to wake him up. He's asleep."

"Fine."

"Don't touch any of the machines or equipment."

"Fine." I pushed at her arm, but her inhuman strength was relentless.

"Only five minutes."

"What?!"

"Only five minutes."

"Fine!" I ground out, "Just let me in!"

I think she wanted to say something else, but I'd already pushed past her, into the ward, closing the door behind me.

There were two beds. One was empty. There was someone in the one by the window, covered with snaking tubes and surrounded by beeping machines.

I walked over slowly, the footsteps on the carpeting strangely loud. There were too many machines in there—call buttons, intercoms, heart monitors, breathe regulators.

He was all bandaged up, like a human mummy. He was—so—different. His chest was barely moving. Something was weird. He was still, far more tranquil than I had ever seen him in life. What am I saying?! He's still alive. He's still Neji.

The tubes were everywhere. The ones on his chest were hooked up to some kind of monitoring machine. Opaque liquid dripped though one inserted into his wrist. He was so thin. He looked depleted, almost starved. The only sustenance he was getting was being fed through a skinny IV tube.

His thick sienna hair was strewn across the pillow, limp and bedraggled. Never, in all the years I've known him, have I seen his hair like that. I wish I had brought a comb and hair band. I wanted to be able to do at least that for him. He was my teammate.

I might've already been dead had it not been for him.

Tomorrow I'll bring him some flowers. Maybe some fruit or something if he can eat by then.

I don't know anything.

At least he's not in a coma, which was what we had feared. He might have never woken up. Neji would be gone. Only a discarded husk would remain, kept polished by some crazy machines.

When will he go on missions again? Team 8 is just not the same without him. Will he ever go on missions again? From what I heard, he was lucky to have even escaped with his life. The shinobi he fought had been one of Orochimaru's personal guards, an S-classed missing nin. They hadn't expected him to survive. He's supposed to be dead.


	3. Chapter 3

Dragon Fruit (3)

After waking up I left for the Konoha hospital. On the way I stopped at Ino's parents' shop and picked up flowers and a basket of fresh Fuji apples. Ino wasn't there.

I was fast, but apparently someone was faster. There was a vase of white roses and a little hamlet of dragon fruit on the table that stood by his bed.

His IV tubes weren't there anymore, so I guess he can eat now. But I didn't stay and wait for him to wake up. The daisies and apples felt cheap and faded besides the other offering. Seeing them set next to each other made it seem like nothing. I quietly set them on the floor and left.

On the way out, I passed a nurse walking in. I stopped her.

"Um, would you happen to know who came and visited Neji Hyuga earlier today?"

"Hm….Neji Hyuga…he's in this room, right? Oh yes; a pretty girl about your age came earlier with some white roses and fruit. She just left about 10 minutes ago."

"Thank you…" I murmured. And then I left.

I'm not stupid; I can put two and two together. It must have been Ino that had brought the white roses and dragon fruit. Her parents' store carried such items.

Although…I thought that Ino liked Sasuke Uchiha. But he's gone now. Ino might have given up on Sasuke and decided that Neji would be his replacement. They were both beautiful alabaster dolls, accomplished prodigies, and part of the strongest clans in Konoha. Even their personalities are very similar. Whom better than Neji Hyuga to replace Sasuke Uchiha?

I don't know what to think. I suppose I should be happy for both of them. Ino was pretty and popular. Neji is a prodigy of the renowned Hyuga clan who's inherited their kekkei genkai, the Byakugan, which is rumored to be as strong, if not stronger than the Sharingan. The Hyuga are a royal clan, which makes him of royalty. I couldn't have chosen better myself.

It's just that it had never occured to me that such a thing would happen. I was foolish, naive. Almost all of us are already hooked up. It had been inevitable.


	4. Chapter 4

Apples (4)

The ward was quiet, save for the quiet dripping of opaque liquid. It wormed its way into Neji's system, winding down the narrow tube and through the inserted needle.

He was propped up on the pillows, eyes closed, head tilted back.

Christmas Eve is a week from today. Outside it snows, but inside it's warm and toasty.

I pulled up a chair and sat down. A vase of white roses sat on the table next to his bed. They were fresh.

I removed an apple from its warm nest in one of the numerous baskets of fruit and began to shave off the smooth dappled skin. By the time I was done, the poor apple was beginning to turn brown and looked a bit like a misshapen lump. Clever as I was with weapons, I was a total klutz when it came to peeling apples. Several cuts stung slightly, a result of slips of the knife.

Neji turned to face me, opening his eyes. He looked down and saw the thing that use to be a perfectly good apple in my hand, and raised one eyebrow, looking bemused. "What happened to the apple?"

Sighing, I bluntly held it out to him. "I happened. That's what." He took it. And sighed. And ate it.

I must admit, I was surprised. I had expected him to refuse it, ignore it, or simply toss it in the trash. But instead, he ate it.

He turned away from me again, instead, looking out the window at the feathery flakes.

"You have cuts on your hand." He still wasn't looking at me, still crunching on the apple, grimacing slightly at the darker parts.

"Huh?"

"You have cuts on your hand."

"Oh. That. It's nothing."

"Make sure they don't become infected."

"They're just cuts. You know as well as I do that I've received much, much worse. I am a shinobi after all."

"A cut is a cut. There are many germs and bacteria floating in the air at a place like this."

I laughed. So he was afraid that I would become sick or something? From a mere cut, no less? "Alright, alright. I'll wash it out later."

"Hn."

"I've got to go now. Training in 5 minutes with Gai and Lee. I'm suppose to 'take full advantage of my youth' and 'let nothing stand in my path'." I rolled my eyes, throwing up my arms in mock defeat, and stood up to leave.

"Hn. Don't get sick."

"Neji, I think you're forgetting that I'm almost as old as you and can take care of myself. You shouldn't be wasting your precious youth lying around in the hospital."

He mumbled something, turning away.

I ran into Hinata on the way out. She was carrying a bough of white roses and baby's breath. I found out that she had been the one leaving the roses, not Ino. I don't know why, but I feel relieved.


	5. Chapter 5

Flip 5

I use to feel safe whenever he was around. Like if anything went wrong, he'd fix it. He'd always be there, ice-cubishly familiar. In his own way, he was the one that upheld our team. I'm trying to get the feeling back, but I can't quite make it. It's almost as if we've switched roles.

Now I'm the one that has to be strong.

He can walk now, but only with a crutch. He gets tired a lot now. There's a rehabilitation place that he's been visiting down by the academy, and he's seeing Granny Tsunade once a week. They're supposed to help him recover, but even they might not be able to bring him back.


	6. Chapter 6

Gifts (6)

Neji was discharged today. He still has to "take it easy" and attend rehab everyday, but at least he's out of the hospital.

Christmas is the day after tomorrow. I still haven't gotten Neji a present.

I don't know what to give him.

So much has changed. Last year I gave him a 24 pack of windmill shuriken. But I can't give him something like that this year. It'll only bring him more pain.

I could give him a sweater or something, but he'd never wear it. Chocolate doesn't seem to be his kind of thing.

There's a box of silk scrolls in the corner of my closet that I purchased about 5 months ago. They had seemed like the perfect gift. Now…I'm not so sure.

I tried to talk to Ino about it, but she looked at me like, Why are we talking about something stupid like this?

After training I was going to ask Lee. But he'd just managed to open the 6th gate, and I couldn't bring myself to spoil his mood.

My mom had ended up being the one I talked to. Sort-of.

"Tenten, what's wrong? You look gloomy today."

I grunted, not bothering to look in her direction. What did she know?/Couldn't she just leave me alone?

"Tenten, is this about Neji Hyuga?"

I jerked to a stop, almost as if I'd crashed into a wall that had suddenly materialized from thin air, created from her words. She'd hit the nail on the head.

"Look, Tenten, I know that this must be hard for you, but you've got to stick up to it. Give him some time to recuperate."

"But the thing is…I don't know if he'll ever...be the same."

"I'm sure he will. He's a strong boy."

"Mom, what should I get him for Christmas?"

"Didn't you get that scroll set for him?"

"It's not the right thing to give him right now. But what is the right thing to give him? He's so difficult. I can't get him any of the usual things."

A slight pause. Then she smiled slightly, wrapping her fingers around the mug she was holding. "Don't buy him anything."

"What?"

"Don't buy him a present. Give him one. Spend your day with him. Go somewhere. Do something. He needs company. Even shinobi need breaks."

"Uh…right….whatever…I've sort of…got to go. Bye mom."

"Alright hun. Do you have your keys?"

"Check."

I couldn't believe that she'd said that. It was almost like…a date! A date with Neji. But she obviously hadn't meant it like that. We were…friends, teammates. We don't go on dates.

Maybe I'll invite Hinata, Sakura and Ino. That way it won't be a date. I should probably invite Lee too, seeing as he's on my team. As long as Sakura doesn't object.

We can go and see a movie, then hang out at one of our houses. Play games. Fool around. Toast marshmallows.

AN: arg. i don't like where this is going...any suggestions? i think its a little too angsty...we need just a tiny bit more happy goodness...

if anyone has any ideas, just let me know, k? all reviews are sent directly to me, and i READ them. lol. yeah.

eh...i think i should make the paragraphs longer...what do u think?


	7. Chapter 7

Brownies (7)

Most girls can cook. Or at least bake. I can do...neither. At least, not without assistance. There is an exception though. Brownies.

I discovered this in third grade. We had a bake sale and everyone was required to participate. Everyone, including me. Try as I had, I couldn't get out of that one. So I decided to try my hand at brownies, and 'lo and behold!

I like my brownies with a light crunchy shell and a soft, moist core. Rich and full, none of that low-cal stuff. Sakura and Ino would totally freak if they found out how many calories were in each bite. But I don't like the brownies that are too sweet, to the point that they overwhelm the taste and pleasure, to the point that they make you tired of eating brownies. Instead of regular milk chocolate bits, I always put in dark chocolate kisses.

The brownies I made for tomorrow are in the oven right now, baking to yummy perfection. In about 15 minutes they'll be done and ready for when we come back from the movie theater. If we go to someone else's house, we can stop by and pick them up.


	8. Chapter 8

Tug (8)

The sky was kind of dusty and tired looking. Maybe it was recovering from a cold.

Christmas. That's today. It was barely nine in the morning and the streets were already full and shops were open and crowded. People mingled in laughing, swirling groups.

Neji came with Hinata, and we went in to where Ino, Sakura and Shikamaru were saving seats for us. Lee had declined to come, and apparently, Ino had found herself a new boyfriend.

We filed in, careful not to trip on the outstretched jungle of legs. Hinata walked in front, leading. Neji was in the middle. I walked in back. That way, if he had fallen, I could have caught him from behind. My training wasn't for nothing.

The seating ended up being in that order. Shikamaru, Ino, Sakura, Hinata, Neji, me. Buckets of popcorn and candy stood between every other person.

The lights dimmed and I couldn't help but look at him through the side of my eye. He wasn't as thin as he had been in the hospital, but he still looked too fragile for Neji. His hair was back to its thick onyx mass of silk. He still needed his crutch, but he didn't get tired as easily anymore. I could see the old Neji fighting to come through.

I felt happy then, thrilled, almost. It was as if a slight padding had been put over the harsh, sharp realities. At the same time, a thin layer was peeled away, leaving the world clear and intense. I felt alive. Everything was aflame with wild clarity. I could feel his presence thick in the air. The buttery salt smell of popcorn and chocolate, and something like cinnamon coated my nose. I could almost taste it.

The film started and I tried to relax, to concentrate on the movie. Spirited Away, by Miyazaki. One of my favorites.

His image was still scorched behind my eyes.

The movie ended much too soon and we left for Hinata's house, stopping on the way to pick up the brownies, marshmallows, toasting forks and games.

It was then that it accrued to me. I finally realized who I was dealing with. Neji Hyuga. The Neji Hyuga. Prodogy of the Hyuga clan. And he was right next to me, never more than a foot away. He might be injured, but it was still him. Once or twice our thys brushed and I swear that I could almost feel heat blossom from there.

I lagged, staying about a half step behind him. Hopefully he didn't see how flustered I was. All those little details…they registered as a flood of confusion, painstakingly sorted out.

Once we arrived at the estate Neji left, leaving us brushing snow off our clothing in the doorway. Light flakes of cloud peppered the air.

Ino couldn't keep off of Shikamaru. Her hands were always grabbing his, pulling him with her everywhere she went. Shikamaru wasn't doing much, but he let himself get pulled and seemed pleased with himself. I couldn't help but think…what if it was me and Neji that were holding hands?

Fat chance.

Any kind of touching or physical contact is strictly a no-no with Neji. It may have been nearly a year ago, but I still remember when Ino had tried to hug him and stroke his hair.

She hadn't been able to look at him for two days without bursting out with tears. She should have known about the hugging, but I can't really blame her on the other. Once in a while, I, too, get the urge to feel his shimmer sienna locks. God. If he ever finds out I'll never be able to look him straight in the face again for the rest of my life.

After the movie we split up to look for presents. We're to meet back at Oden Paradise at 6:30 sharp.

Shikamaru, I got him an American chessboard. Think he'll have fun with that. Sakura and Ino, they'll be getting jackets from Shin0bi. That took up most of my money. I've been in there before, but this is the first time I've every purchased anything from there. It's so damn expensive! I saw a really nice scarf there, but it was like 5,000 yen. So that's out.

I know that I wasn't planning to get Neji a present, but this feels wrong. I seriously need to get him something. But I'm running out of money. Looks like I'll just have to skip dinner. It's better than turning up with no present for him.

--

By the time I got back to Oden Paradise at 6:30 everyone was already there. Ino and Sakura…well, they're practiced shoppers. But Neji and Shikamaru? Surprise there.

Everyone ordered, except me. Awkward.

Hinata turned from the waitress to look at me. "Tenten, are you ready yet?"

"Um…I don't want anything. Not hungry." That came out way too fast. Not so convincing, especially when my traitorous stomach gave a slight moaning growl to back my statement.

Hinata raised her eyebrows slightly. "Tenten, are you sure?"

"Positive."

"Alright then…if you want."

Shrugging, the waitress left. The leather seats shifted slightly as Neji left to wash his hands.

The same waitress, Nancy, I think her name was, came back in about 15 minutes, balancing two trays with three bowls of steaming oden on each. Mad skills. But three bowls on each tray? That makes six bowls of oden.

Hinata glanced around, and then looked back at me. "Um…Tenten, I ordered an extra bowl for you."

That was just like Hinata, to think of others. "Thanks…Hinata. Appreciate it. To tell the truth, I'm starving."

Hinata smiled vaguely, glancing around again.

--

Ino grinned slyly, almost deviously. "Alright, everyone. Since the guys aren't here now, it's time to play truth or dare!"

Sakura suddenly brightened up, grinning too. "Sure…there are some things that I've been dying to find out."

Oh no. Nothing good every came when Ino and Sakura decided to play Truth or Dare. Desperately, I turned to Hinata for help. "Hinata…"

"Well…I've been slightly curious too."

"Hinata! I was counting on you to side with me!"

"I'm…I'm sorry Tenten. But there really are some things that I'm curious about."

"Fine. Be that way." I folded my arms and mock-pouted. Hey, maybe I'd be able to find out some info myself. They weren't going to be the only ones that gained.

I started feeling giddy and bubbly at the same time and my heart started pounding like it was a big deal. Which it wasn't.

"Alright then!" announced Ino elastically, "It's been decided. We're going to play Truth or Dare. Repeat after me. 'I will tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. If I receive a dare, I will carry it out to the best of my ability with good sportsmanship.' I'm starting. You know the drill."

She turned to me immediately. Oh God, please, not me already! "So, Tenten…Truth or Dare?"

"Truth." This was Ino asking me, after all. If I chose 'dare', she might have had me do something crazy, like steal a guys boxers or something.

"Do you think Neji likes you?"

What kind of a question was that? "We're just teammates, dope."

"Then why were you sitting next to him in the theatre andat Oden Pradise? Hmm?"

"Coincidence."

"Well then, how did you manage to get him to come with us?" she retorted.

"I asked. Duh. What, did you think that I kidnapped him or something? He may not be in top condition, but he still is theNeji Hyuga."

"My point exactly!"  
At this point, Sakura butted in. Apparently, she wanted to torture me too. "Neji Hyuga is known to be stoic, aloof and anti-social. How did you manage to get him to come with us? Did you tell him it was a date or something?"

Ino snorted with laughter at this. Boy, this was really starting to tic me off.

"I did not! He just agreed to come. Sheesh."

"Oooo, Tenten's getting touchy! I think we're onto something, Sakura!"

"You have no proof!" At this point, I was starting to feel tendrils of heat crawl slyly up my face. When had this turned into a let's-all-attack-Tenten fest?

"Hinata," Ino turned to Hinata, almost shaking with glee, "Tell Tenten what you told us earlier."

"Well, Tenten…your oden…it wasn't me. It was Neji."

That…really surprised me. The fact that it had been him. And that Hinata told them and not me. But I wasn't about to be taken down by Ino.

"I repeat, we're teammates."

"I don't see Neji buying Lee oden."

"How would you know? What, you stalk him or something?" Score. One point for Team Tenten!

"I do not stalk him! It's called 'careful observation'. If you don't like him, then why are you blushing right now? Hm…Tenten?" She nudged me, with that stupid smug little smile of hers plastered on her face.

"I already answered your stupid question, damnit! It's my turn now!"

I whirled around to face Sakura. They weren't going to have all the fun.

"Sakura, Truth or Dare?"

"Um…dare."

Just as I had predicted. "I dare you to…ask Neji if he has a girlfriend. Tomorrow, at breakfast. Or tonight, once everyone is here. Your choice."

"You dared me that because you want to find out if Neji's available, ne?"

"Heck no! I…I couldn't care less. He could be dating you, for all I care." But Sakrua was right. I did care.

"Pfft. What a lie. Alright Tenten. Truth or Dare?" Sakura asked.

"What! Me again?"

"Truth or dare?" she repeated.

"Dare," I sighed.

"I dare you to…hug Hyuga before we leave. Neji Hyuga."

"What the hell, Sakura! Do you want me to get killed or something? If I'm lucky he'll just throw me to the ground. If I'm not lucky…I don't even want to think about it."

Hinata cautiously tapped Sakura on the shoulder, who turned to face her. "Um, Sakura-chan…maybe this isn't a good idea…Tenten seriously could get hurt. Physically."

At this, Sakura threw up her hands in mock defeat. She turned back to me, sighing. "Feel lucky that Hnata is here. I'm going to change your dare to…holding hands."

I sighed. Probably the best I could possibly hope for. I was almost…thankful for this dare. God, I feel ashamed to admit it…but I sort-of want to try and hold his hand. The dare gave me an excuse. I know I must be crazy. I'm risking much more than just physical injury. In his condition right now, he wouldn't be able to keep up with me. Our…um…friendship? Being on the same team a him—that means that I'll be seeing him for nearly every single day. It would be so awkward if he hated me for it.

But what if he didn't?

At Oden Paradise…I hadn't sat next to him—he sat next to me. And he ordered and paid for my oden. He doesn't do that for Lee or Gai. And I had managed to get him to come with us, right? Maybe…what if…he does like me?

Qualifications to be like by the Neji Hyuga, prodigy and genius of the renowned Hyuga clan:

….none.

I'm not the prettiest. Duh. First place taken by Ino. I'm not the smartest. Claimed by Sakura. A few months ago I would have been able to claim the title as "strongest". But ever since Sakura has started training with Tsunade-sama, the Tsunade-sama, Hokage, I'm not so sure.

So what is there left? Well…I'm single. That's it. Sad. But that's not necessarily a good thing. That just means that no one likes me. Hinata is taken by Naruto, Sakura by Sasuke, even if both of them are gone. Ino is with Shikamaru. Which leaves me by my lonesome. Life's so not fair.

AN: okay, u ppl probably think i have no life, because i have posted at least 15 things withen 3 days. well...i think i'll just let u know that i wrote all that beforehand. the only thing i've written the past few days is my history oritorical. (


	9. Chapter 9

Lee-kun: My Friend, Who Beat a Prodigy (10)

Rock Lee. Lee-kun. Guess what? I was always on your side. I had always supported you in your ambitions, your dreams, no matter how crazy. But now you've gone too far. I can't let this happen. You don't know what you broke with your Primary Lotus.

You hurt his Hyuga pride. His damn pride that was doubled and tripled by his arrogance and genius. He once was a branch member. You split his self-confidence. To him, he is a branch member again.

I don't blame you for wanting to defeat the Hyuga, but why did you have to chose now? He was at his weakest state. He needed assurance. He'll never realize it, but he needed you.

I feel so bad, confused, overpowered. I should be happy for you. I should be. After all the putdowns and challenges you endured everyday just to get here, you deserve to succeed. But I can't.

Lee-kun…forgive me…but…I hate you, Lee-kun. I hate you for what you did. I hate you Lee-kun. I hate you.

AN: okay...i need a break from all this angst. Angsting is unhealthy, Tenten! So is hating people! Tenten, what's happening? Hmmm...the pair i currently support the most is Sakura x Neji, not Tenten x Neji, so i'm concidering changing it to Sakura x Neji instead of Tenten x Neji. Should I?


	10. Chapter 10

Pet Peeves (10)

Almost everyone I know has something about missions that just bug then every time. With Sakura, it's hygiene. With Ino, it's her hair. Hinata—she's afraid of being a nuisance to the team.

Me…I'm fine with missions that only last a day or less. As long as we don't have to camp out. It makes things rather uncomfortable. I talk in my sleep.

4 out of 5 times I usually wake up to find Lee bending over me with Neji giving him the infamous Hyuga glare. Unfortunately, Lee seems immune to it. He's one of the two people that I know are. Gai is the other.

The only plausible explanation is that I talk in my sleep. Not that any of them will admit it. I've tried asking them, but the conversation usually ends up going something like this:

"Lee. Why were you bending over me?"

"Oh, Tenten, our youthful flower, I wasn't!"

"Oh yes you were. Do I talk in my sleep or something?"

"No Tenten! You don't talk in your sleep!"

At this point, Gai usually comes in with a blinding set of teeth and his infamous nice-guy pose. "That's right Tenten! Trust Lee. Word of a gentleman."

It's hopeless. But talking in my sleep is the only thing that I can possibly imagine. Unless…Lee was staring at my…well, breasts. That's just so wrong. Lee would never do such a thing. Anyways, he doesn't like me. Everyone knows that he's infatuated with Sakura.

Now that I think of it, that isn't the only thing that bugs me about missions. The other thing is bathroom breaks. You're out in the wild, and you need to use the restroom. I usually try to hold it until we get to some town or something, but it's just not humanly possible all the time. I go about 60 yards away from the rest of the team. The only one that could see that far is…Neji.

But the good thing is, I know he's not a pervert like that Ero-Sennin that Naruto trains with. Imagine if all the Hyuga's were perverts. It would be so scary. Even their attacks could be perverted. Like Neji's jukken when he aims for the heart. Which is…you know…behind something. Bleh. I can just imagine the news's headings right now. 'Beware of pervert Byakugan users!' or 'Bloodline misused!'

My final and biggest pet peeve is when I have to go on missions during my 'monthly'. You have no idea how complicated it makes everything. Especially when the team consists of Lee, Gai and Neji. They're all guys.

Hinata…her sensei is Kurinai. Which means that even if her teammates are guys, at least her team leader is a female. Sakura…well, while her sensei is a guy, Kikashi is so much more sensitive than Gai. Gai doesn't even know what the hell is going on, for pete's sake. He probably thinks that it doesn't happen till your 17 or something. It's not a wonder that he's single. I don't think he ever even had a girlfriend. Lee doesn't stand a chance with Sakura if he keeps shadowing Gai.

Neji…he's single 'cause he wants to be. I mean, he doesn't attract any girls, right? Only about…oh, let's see…half the village. Seriously. Only that Uchiha Sasuke is in the same realm as him.

But every time one of those drooling stalker-girls asks him out, he turns them down. Flatly. A cold shoulder and a cutting glare.

Just like how he pushes everyone else away.

I don't know what happened to him. He changed. I still remember when he was different. He changed. Just like that Uchiha kid. They both changed.

Actually, I know. I have heard about it from Hinata, from Gai, from Neji himself. I have heard snippets and patches that give me a hazy overview. I have heard, but I don't know.

Only he knows. He knows; I don't. No one knows.

He knows everything. He is everything. A perfect angel. A model. A god. A stone angle, a stone model, a stone god. Never budging, never responding. Barely into a dozen years of his life, 'the' began proceeding his name.

What am I? A simple konouchi with a simple dream. But now I'm not so sure. I don't know what I want. Not anymore. Tsunade-sama use to be my aspiration, she use to be the flag, but now she seems so far away, so unreachable, I'm not even sure if she really is my goal anymore, I don't know anything.

Stop and smell the roses, Tenten. Why don't you stop and smell the roses? But roses have thorns that prick, that hurt. A kanouchi shouldn't care about a little hurt, but I don't want to get hurt; I just want to reach my goal, my goal. Where?

I'm just calling out the shoots, just reading the words, just walking down the beaten road to somewhere. Impossible dreams, they say. But they were the ones that had said that anything is possible. Stick with the program, Tenten, they say. Everyone else? They were way ahead of you before you even go started.

Quit fighting for an impossible mirage. You're running in the wrong direction.

I know what my biggest pet peeve is. I know. I can't live without him, can't live with him. He's here, but he's not mine. I have no right. Stop chasing a mirage.

AN: all Tenten ever does is angst, angst, angst. Bleh. She's turning into Sasuke! omg, run for your lives, eeekkkk!! jk, jk.

Tenten needs to get a life! All she ever thinks about is Neji...

okay, i have some stuff that i've written for this, thats supposed to take place later on. much more romance and interaction between the two...but i don't know if i should develop the story in that direction...i'm going to be posting elsewhere (Marshmallows, Possible Scenes) i really need to know if i should use it or not...

I think I probably will be keeping this as TentenxNeji. It's just too big of a mess to change it to SakuraxNeji and it seems like people are against it. The main reason I like SakuraxNeji more than TentenxNeji is because Tenten doesn't get much strong during the time skip, so in Shippuuden she's not really strong anymore...

I recently reworked a TentenXNeji fic called "Paper Butterflies". If you liked this one, you'll definatly like that one. It's a lot more intense than this one (this one is more slow paced and realistic...but don't worry, I promise I'll pic up the pace on this and make it much more intensive) and I think it's more polished. Go and check it out on my profile if you have time.


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